Beauty
1-12-97
She smiles broadly, attractively
And the sparkle in her eye tells you her laugh is genuine
Friendly and compassionate, she invites you in
Just beneath the surface
Close enough to see from a distance her unsure self
Desperately seeking a companion to reassure her
That she's wrong, that she's beautiful
And close enough to see there is nothing to fear
For she sees the world through her own beautiful eyes
Never realizing the immense treasure is herself
Camping Trip
1-13-97
Only three wrong turns, you're finally there
Trip through the dark, set up the site
C-c-cold, build a fire
Look up, there are billions of stars you've never seen
Was that a branch falling? Fight the paranoia
Those coyotes can't be as close as they sound
Crawl in the tent and feel your feet freeze
Curse the root you slept on, and rise early
Count your members every so often
Include that crazy man who's been
Hacking on a log for hours in the background
Shoot the ground, shoot the tree, miss the target
Hike through a bog, never mind the mosquitos
Remember the flashlight, mark your path
Look forward to home, a nice warm bath.
O Mighty Titan
1-13-97
O mighty Titan, once beheld as the epitome of power
Revelling in your glory, expanding by the hour!
O sabotaged virtue, by your own might corrupted -
Crushed from all sides, your regime interrupted.
O Divine authority, whence come you now?
How ironic the seed of the place you endow.
Osu Kannon at Night
1-17-97
The grand, empty temple is closed for the night
The flocks and droves gone, reserving the right
To retire to Pachinko Palace, blazing with light
Smoke, noise, glitter, gambling - oh what a sight!
Outside the new temple a wandering child
Appeals with his eyes 'Have you seen my mommy?'
A kitty-kat raised in the city a-wild
Scrounges through darkness to fill its tummy.
The vans in the temple ground house souvenir stands
Converted to beds - will they sleep here tonight?
In the bed of the fountain gleams a faint light
Reflecting the moon off the shape of some beer cans.
The sun cannot see the sleepy Buddha's face,
His displeasure at reigning this nightly disgrace.
And yet this is not a forsaken place
For tomorrow again will begin the rat race.
But You Can't Go Back
1-18-97
I miss my freshman year
the sun warming the hall in the afternoon
the plain white Christmas lights
the miracle of chapel
the Pull
I miss my sophomore year
Ben & Jerry's on the love seat
Late nights with Carrie and Sherri
volleyball in the summer
I miss my junior year
meeting so many new people
Cluster 1-4
I think I'm going to miss my whole stinking life
when it's done
The Race
1-31-97
On the other side of the wall, the traffic flows the same
Each license is registered, each driver has a name
The same lights flash and blink to draw in the crowd
It's but in my head if there is a shroud
If I just watch the headlights and shining silhouettes
I realize now what I sometimes forget.
There is but one Earth
This life is the same life
We share the same struggles wrestling in the mob
Of faces, faces, faces, rushing to their jobs.
My simple brain cannot comprehend the enormity
Though embracing or rejecting non-conformity
I and she and you and they are what is called
Human.
Le Fleuve Qui Vit (Living River)
1-31-97
Its winding course curves this way and that, spilling drops at every turn
Each tiny drop rushing around the bend trying to get ahead
Some scrape the bottom, some lag slowly behind
Others press forward and even push at the riverbed itself
It is thirsty, but cannot consume itself, and so longs for satisfaction
But from beginning to end, there is always water
Here, there, no matter where, some droplet has preceded, some will succeed
And the wetness always pushes, surrounds itself
Until finally it reaches the ocean.
The Lake
2-8-97
I can barely hear the slip-slap of the lake's cautious undulation
Without expecting the rumble of an orange pontoon
And the rattle of a tackle box in Grandpa's hand.
Numbers
2-10-97
It's three seven oh two four three nine six five
I have to remember each day I'm alive.
Add that to six seven six three two one eight
And four-thirteen Lincoln and my info's all straight
Yes, I'm nineteen, born nine fourteen seventy-six
It's flight nine on March tenth, you say? That must be fixed.
The number to call is six five two three eight,
But our train's at five thirty, we're going to be late!
Stop seven, exit four, three blocks, on your right
The name's Eighty-Six West, we'll be searching all night.
Twenty-one is the goal but I bust every time
And the three-to-one breaks me by half past nine.
Finally back to seventy-three Patton Drive
With two minutes left 'til a quarter to five
The double-u two's and the others can wait
Because I'm going to sleep 'til nineteen ninety-eight.
Highway America
2-11-97
Cruisin' along at about seventy-five
Serene nature scenes hurtling by,
Reminiscent of childhood adventure
Now flying past with no further mention.
This grandma in front of me crawls along
As I brake to the rhythm of my CD's song.
Just like all others, I hate to slow down
So I flip off the cruise and the silver-crown.
The entire country is late for work
And everyone becomes a maniacal jerk --
Passing on the right, then hitting their brakes,
All schizophrenic and going to be late.
As the age-old proverb wisely warns,
"Give 'em an inch and they'll honk their horns."
This causes me to frantically worry,
But then I remember I'm not in a hurry.
I feel I should floor it to stay with the flow
Of jockeys racing to get where they go,
But Highway America has too much traffic,
So I'm getting off the very next exit.
History Professor
2-11-97
I've been building a funnel for an hour and a half
Thank you for listening and not quite falling asleep
Now I'll ask a question with unspoken presumption
That you'll give me the answer I memorized in school.
Regurgitation is my specialty, you see, I got a Ph.D
When I pour the information, it had better come out the other end
Just as expected, or it will be rejected
Funnels are innovative, but not too creative
And if you aspire to make your own someday
You'd better learn to use mine first.
Yo Mao
2-11-97
"Los Angeles is within range," you say.
Oh, but so is your capital. What the hey?
Why not start another nuclear war?
Who needs a cause worth fighting for?
Let's just destroy and bomb and kill
Over pride and semantics and racism until
The whole world knows we've lost our minds
And won't give up or look behind.
Is that what you want? The end of the world?
Imperialist communism and vague threats hurled
May very well bring it to pass
As the world stands up to confront such crass.
The center of the world is noplace now,
Nowhere is that title endowed.
Whaddaya say we take it down a notch,
Get off our high horses and make conversation.
It's amazing what can be accomplished
With open ears as a liberal nation.
Super Bowl Fan
2-11-97
I'm a Cheesehead and proud to be
One of thousands just like me
Screaming and waving to get on T.V.
And cheer the Packers to victory!
This is the game of the century,
And these seats cost me a good kidney
There's beer as far as the eye can see
This is heaven to a guy like me!
Of course they'll remember next January
Which team emerged triumphantly
This game will go down in history
As Green Bay Packer property!
Stumbling home a bit tipsy
But quite slap-happy-hiccupy
I say hi to my family
They say, "We saw you on T.V."
Overjoyed, I yell, "Really?"
My wife says, "Of course, silly.
Every inch of your bare belly."
I give her a hug and a big wet willy.
God
2-11-97
God has a life -- imagine that!
and you have made it bright
Simply by existing
and taking part in life.
God enjoys to watch you think
and discover for yourself
The way to live, the way to love,
the virtue found in help.
God's home is not Heaven
nor in the clouds above,
But in the heart of everyone
who lives a life of love.
Motive
2-11-97
I exist but to help and serve
And ne'er expect a thing
For love and faith and selflessness
I make myself nothing.
I don't want my 30 seconds of fame,
I want it for a lifetime.
I search and strive to be well-known
By strangers and my own mind.
Self or no, I must decide
Yet to and fro I sway.
Motive is seen not, nor does it hide,
This game it loves to play.
Subway Encounter with Loneliness
2-14-97
The subway is packed tonight, so much so that
a stranger's body is pressed full against mine.
Of course it's uncomfortable for her and me both
until the feeling triggers the memory of another time.
Yes, once upon a time, I held her close
as we beheld the storm from underneath a tree.
I remember feeding the ducks bread crumbs
and adoring her eyes as she said she loved me.
Closing my eyes, I can see her once again,
I can feel her, but wait, she was never this tall.
Looking about, I come to remember that
this warm-bodied person is only a stranger after all.
I shouldn't abandon myself to long-ago memories.
It's been months since our last goodbye.
I'm not sure how to avoid breathing on this woman's hair,
so in turning my head I release a sigh.
Still, her warmth presses into my heart
and I recall a custom so foreign and bold --
I am trapped in her embrace, my best friend,
upon her departure with emotions untold.
Oh, for a hug! What a joy that would be
to feel someone who loves me holding me tight.
Actually, that's too exclusive, I think
a hug from almost anyone would be all right.
Wait, who is this? Someone come to embrace
or ... no, once again, the stranger abides.
I wonder what her name is, or if she knows
she has been transforming throughout the ride.
Upon reaching the next station, crowds swarm
out from the car, and my stranger walks a step ahead.
I deliberately slow my pace and lose her
in a sea of people who all look ready for bed.
Of course I will never see her again
and she will remain ignorant of who she became.
In the winding channels of my mind only
were she and my memories one and the same.
Uchi-Soto
2-16-97
Understood from the outside, everything seems
Strange, unfamiliar, frightening, threatening.
We are We, and clearly They are They
Though the fundamental difference is difficult to convey.
From the outside, They are unknown, possibly malevolent.
Certainly the last thing We need is benevolence.
But wait, did you know that They think the same things?
They have an inside, which cannot be seen.
Frightened, clinging to needless separation,
We each make ourselves different and, in our minds, better.
But on the inside there is truly no division
For life is a journey we must travel together.
Who is the Teacher?
2-20-97
I feel like a Rangaku-sha
debating with the Neo-Confucianists
although I've not yet been challenged
I know my ideas are not earth-shaking
Perhaps I am also the Neo-Confucianist
criticizing my own transformation
although I see the value in it
and eventually it will help.
Happy New Year!
2-22-97
Just a reminder that you are alive here.
To those who live not near our sun, it is meaningless.
Hypocrite That I Am
2-22-97
I think I am the best person on earth.
No one else's ideas are of worth.
I give myself all authority
To proclaim what is true for me.
I delight in my own company alone;
You will never see my throne.
These words aloud I will not speak
For they prove that I am weak.
But hide them as I may
They will reveal themselves someday,
When by their mark I am rejected
By those whose thoughts are well-protected.
Until then, I will take the knife
To carve and lead a simple life.
Pledge of Allegiance
2-27-97
I pledge allegiance to the Bible
of the fundamentalists of America,
and to the conformity which it demands:
one salvation, under God, indisputable,
with authority and doctrine for all.
Piper is a Poof
2-27-97
You can sneak behind and tackle her and roll around the floor
And hug and squeeze and laugh with her until your sides are sore
You can bounce around the room without expecting something more
Because that's what's so fun about a poof.
You can relax and get comfortable and even fall asleep
With the gentleness and safety of a daughter counting sheep
An slowly drift to happiness upon a river deep
Beause that's what's peaceful about a poof.
You can hold a conversation and be sure she will not lie
As you surely come to realize that as the days go by
She remains a loyal friend to you until the day you die
Because that's what's reliable about a poof.
You can flop her, turn her, angle her, and look her up and down
And squeeze to find the properties of what makes her so round
But the stuff that she is made of will never quite be found
Because that's what's mysterious about a poof.
You can turn her any which way but she'll always be herself
With a unique personality you can't put on the shelf
Or escape without quite a bit of sorrow to yourself
And that's why I say Piper is a poof.
Carry-on Luggage
2-28-97
I should know myself better than this.
The blood pressure in my extremeties is rapidly dropping.
Someone's attached these weights to my knees
And I can hear my shoulder joints cracking and popping.
The demons have brought their fire to my spine
And it's all I can muster to walk without stopping.
Onward I press through the whirlwind storms
Which batter my brain from left and from right,
The winds of people merrily strolling
Unburdened, unconcerned with my desperate plight.
I'm dragging an elephant through the sand
With not an oasis appearing in sight.
I stumble a bit and trip on the floor
As I silently curse my fool idiot head.
What kind of masochist would think it necessary
To carry along these bags full of lead?
Though I've always believed myself fairly intelligent,
For my weakness and idiocy, I'm better off dead.
I force my way through the thickening jello
Which used to be breatheable, once upon a day.
With grunting and groaning I find my seat,
Creating a maximum public display.
Mental note: Next time, check all luggage,
Since I only look out the window anyway.
Some Fires
2-28-97
Some fires burn hot on the inside,
the coals emblazoned with heat.
Others have cool but colorful flames,
dancing, a visual treat.
Though you know not the fire but by its flame,
beware the judgment you make.
A faulty assumption about its core
Could be a harmful mistake.
Rose Bud
3-3-97
The rose bud gently growing,
knowing but the air,
Blossoms forth with sunshine,
warmth and tender care.
The icy wind of winter
cares little for the bud,
Once more swiftly sweeping
and freezing surface mud.
The rose bud quietly hiding,
hoping for the sun,
Reveals her glorious face
when the thawing has begun.
Rising forth in beauty,
spreading eagle wings,
She loves her life with fullness
and hungers for the spring.
With open arms, defenseless,
she makes an easy prey
For Winter Wind was hiding
and waiting for this day.
Blown about and dying,
the rose bud wants no more
Than simply to have lived her life
and sleep forevermore.
Behold
3-8-97
The dirty old man smoking as he swaggers.
The unshaven punk brandishing daggers.
The taxi driver, unjustifiably rude.
The homeless mother begging for food.
The handicapped lady who gets in your way.
The clumsy co-worker who spills his ashtray.
The Sunday-driving grandma when you're late for work.
The best friend turned arrogant jerk.
The innocent child with rosy-red cheeks.
The politician who grins when he speaks.
The anonymous person who left you a rose.
The neighbor with a forest growing in his nose.
The prostitute standing, chilled by the wind.
The rapist who doesn't believe he sinned.
The preacher on Sunday who shouts of hellfire.
The incorrigible who pushes you down to the wire.
The wonderful spouse who holds you tight.
The horrible spouse who picks a fight.
The Buddhist monk you may never meet.
The admirer who lays gifts at your feet.
The swindler who claims his wares are first-rate.
The lady who's two hundred pounds overweight.
The selfless passenger who lets you sit down.
The manipulative king who strengthens his crown.
The annoying crusader who wants to convert you.
The lover who had no intention to hurt you.
The salaryman on his daily commute.
The owner of establishments of ill repute.
The pizza delivery boy who smiles for your tip.
The accident victim with no upper lip.
The Middle Eastern teen who must fight for his home.
The widow who spends her evenings alone.
Those whom you love, and those you dislike.
The good and the bad and the ugly alike.
Because he loves, because he forgives,
Behold the face of Jesus; he lives.
Company
3-22-97
Another day gone by with the purple sky in my ear
i wander, what is it about you? the familiar mystery
is calling, calling
The biting shivers are not so bad when we share
but i can't when you sit at the bottom of the ocean
Enjoying the weather
is it me? Yes, finally at reuniting time
at least i know your tongue, but the lies
the hopes
are false
Somehow I need you
you love it too
Christian Car
3-22-97
Sturdy. Junker.
Lemon. Peach.
Betsy. Harold.
Trashed. Immaculate.
Plush. Worn.
Hi-Fi. Transistor.
Manual. Auto.
Power. Crank.
Rollerskate. Whale.
Sputtering. Smooth.
Comfortable. Uncomfortable.
Holy Spirit of God.
A Poem About Whether I Believe The Existence of the
Christian God to be an Ontological Necessity or Whether Other Viable
Options Exist or Whether Any of the Arguments Really Matter at All
3-27-97
Yes.
Heart of Flesh
3-28-97
O curse this heart of flesh!
Pricked and prodded, trampled, bleeding
Scabbed and ugly, never seen
by mortal eyes
Longing to be filled
Not with doubt upon doubt
Not with mystical comfort
But the touch of another
Ugly, cursed heart of flesh!
Run and Play
4-2-97
To frolic, to go, it's all I know!
Run run run, it's so much fun!
Can we play, let's go this way!
This way, this way, to go and play!
Turn around, we're wrong-way bound!
Okay, I will not stand my ground.
Let me lead, oh let me lead!
To frolic and run, it's fun fun fun!
Recall to Worship
4-2-97
Lifting high as a present my voice, my heart
Light and sparkles drifting through stained glass
The smell of holiness and a choir of angels,
My brothers, my sisters, they love, we care
Daring to fly above, above the dark and din
Somehow knowing the truth not revealed
Under the sun this life can be left behind
For an instant, an eternity, and all the rest
They love to sing, they glow in our radiance
Your face is beautiful, I can almost touch it
Smiling benevolently upon the grateful bride
How bright, how spotless in that moment
Filled to overflowing with love, sweet love
Receiving freely with spiritual fervor the mind
Escaped from troubles, no burdens rising flying
Standing firmly on the cloud of light
Recalling redeeming convincing conceiving
Of the things I will have never seen
You are love, and I am yours
Sleepdrifting
4-9-97
Falling asleep on the edge of the deep
I am drifting away on a cloud
My eyelids will creep and I doubtful can keep
Much longer away from the shroud.
For darkness it comes with a dull, low hum
And stills the air round my face
Slowly a drum, with its deep rum-pum
Silent relaxes its pace.
Bags full of sand appear in my hands
And weakness it blankets my soul
From pushing this man as far as I can
To the edge of this peaceful black hole.
Of Untold Wisdom
4-10-97
Why don't you just tell them? Come on, spit it out!
No, I am a stumbling block, offending the devout.
Wrong, you are a person, realize yourself!
No, I will be treated as an impish little elf.
You never know the future till you take a forward step!
Nevertheless, my preference is nothing to disrupt.
You've pondered long and hard, pondered life and death!
And so I will once more when you stop wasting your breath.
You are just afraid of rejection you might find!
The world wants not sincerity, but people of like mind.
The world's in need of wisdom, please give your share!
Words cannot express it, and people do not care.
Blind Love
4-12-97
Full of zeal a child of God
Projecting emotion as holy command
He loved and longed to see the nod
Affirming he could take her hand
Full of courage, full of fear
Full of neglect for reality
Her eversweet Yes he strove to hear
And broke his heart unbearably
Life and love they go together
Like the horizon and the sky
Either one without the other
Fails extremely as time goes by
Mr. Poetry
4-12-97
The bean is brought by friend or foe
Any flavor will do, whatever fits your taste
Unwrapped, thoughtfully ground
And beginning to bubble
Percolating in gray matter
Till the timer just dings! and you pour
A big cup
Of great awakening.
Funny Earth
4-12-97
This earth, it is a funny earth!
I cannot fathom all its girth.
It cannot fit in overalls,
You cannot bounce it on the wall.
I think it likes me very much,
Always pulling me to touch
Down and down and down and down,
Trip and fall and kiss the ground.
People push and people jump,
People stomp and thump thump thump.
This funny earth, it pushes back!
You stomp, it gives your foot a smack!
Funny earth, it does not know
If it should pull or let you go.
But we are lucky, yes we are,
The earth befriended quite a star.
Round and round and round they go,
Where they stop, astronomers know.
A cosmic hokey-pokey dance,
It seems absurd at just a glance,
But that's the way of Funny Earth
Who laughs about the universe.
Unexpected or Impossible?
4-12-97
Jesus returned on a Thursday, roundabout three o'clock,
And no one seemed to know her; she slept upon a rock.
"Where are your regal trumpets? Where is your horse of light?"
"My trumpets are the people you trod upon tonight."
"You foolish, naive woman, we know about God's plan."
"Apparently the God you know was fashioned by a man.
Humility I preach to you, humanity to save;
Your deaf, closed-minded faith has no use for me today."
And so she went along her way, teaching the poor and meek.
Pastors plotted her downfall, for she had called them weak.
Since the very beginning, all people have misunderstood,
And their predictions of Messiah are rarely any good.
Fog of Memory
4-12-97
to look through the fog of memory
to hear the echo of past experience
you can react as you choose
for the moment is gone
a mirror is the mind
always self-reflecting
living life backward
stumbling through the present
focused on the past
The Lonely
4-14-97
What I expected, I confess,
is not quite what I found;
my mortal coil was always firmly
attached to the ground.
The gates of wonder open wide
for visitors await;
'tis but a trap, I told myself,
thus sealing my own fate.
The lonely simply wander on
in search of but a soul,
knowing one facade of hell
and never fully whole.
tear
4-15-97
he kneels by her side
just as their marriage day
her face still beautiful
pierces his soul
tense with love
a tear glistens and falls
moistening her skin
Remembering Love
4-20-97
Free from the fetters of worry
Following in the footsteps of God
Trusting and flourishing
In the light of His love
Laughing through life
Flying farther from low lands
To link hands and spirits together
Faith on fire, free to live
Knowing and truly known
O such a time, where art thou
Gone?
Across the Plains
4-25-97
Ghosts speak from the shadows
Transcending time and memory
The joy and jubilant spirit fled
Somewhere across the plains
Welcome to nowhere, the holding place
For resident thoughts and feelings
The wind carries loneliness
From here across the plains
Presence always questioned and questioning
The rules here are hidden
For they are off a-wandering
Somewhere across the plains
Jeremiah 31:3-4
4-27-97
I have loved you with an everlasting love;
We live on a sphere, a tottering sphere
Our gaze on the ground, to our thoughts we adhere
This life is so finite, just stop for a minute
And ponder such love by which God is brought near.
I have drawn you with loving-kindness.
So full of hate, desiring debate
We know our own weakness and slam the front gate
His call is so gentle, the spiritual and mental
Are requested to trust before it's too late.
I will build you up again and you will be rebuilt,
Foundation made rubble, trapped in our bubble
We recognize pain, like Jericho, crumbled
To this carpenter we must hand the hammer
With nothing required save a spirit humble.
O Virgin Israel.
Perverted, impure, prostitution endured,
Scrambling, crumbling, finding no cure
He cleanses us white with forgiveness and light,
Of acceptance and new-ness we may be assured.
You are the One
4-28-97
You want to hear the story of my life
You want to know how I think and feel
For that you could become my wife
For that you seem as yet unreal
You ask, you see, you listen and care,
You wonder, ponder, feel my pain
You take the time to hear and share
You effortlessly dismiss my shame
I've come to believe in angels now
For in your eyes shines heaven's love
You want to know me, even though
You could fly freely as a dove
You elicit memories long forgotten
You teach me how to trust again
I love your heart, as soft as cotton
Spreading joy like drops of rain
You complete me, thank you so much
You are to me a priceless treasure
I savor every single touch
Of heart and hand beyond all measure.
The Judge
5-3-97
The well-dressed defendant sauntered in,
wearing quite a smile;
flanked by lawyers, witnesses, friends,
whistling all the while.
Asked to make a final case,
one lawyer gave a shout,
"We've shown the plaintiff is lying,
beyond a shadow of a doubt!"
The whistling ceased, smugness decreased,
when came the final decision.
"No case built can relieve your guilt.
Life, for your lack of vision."
The second defendant stormed in,
seething from head to toe.
His mother and family also came,
weeping, full of woe.
"See the pain of my family!
They've been traumatized.
Screw this system, screw your Honor,
screw the plaintiff's lies!"
Not in the least did the wailing decrease
when came the judge's reply.
"Defenses built relieve no guilt.
Life, to ponder your crime."
A haggard defendant lumbered in,
eyes upon the ground.
He entered slowly, all alone,
no friends were to be found.
Whispering through tears, he said,
"I'm guilty of my crime.
I have no defense, and I await
your Honor's judgment time."
The reply was swift, a verbal gift,
"You are now released.
Give mercy in the measure you've been given,
and go from here in peace."
How I Joined a Church
5-14-97
I entered the church and found the pastor,
asked him how to get in.
He gave me a Bible and told me to read it,
said it would free me from sin.
Well, I read the Bible, came back the next day,
told him I still had sin.
He said there's no sinners allowed in this church,
sorry, you can't get in.
I entered the church and found the priest,
asked him how to get in.
He gave me a catechism sacrament whatzit,
said it would free me from sin.
Well, I read the whatzit, came back the next day,
told him I still had sin.
He said you went to that other church, didn't you,
sorry, you can't get in.
I entered the church and found some guy,
asked him how to get in.
He told me about this guy named Jesus,
said he would free me from sin.
Well, I asked him some questions, found out more,
told him I still had sin.
He said that's okay, everyone does,
you're welcome to come on in.
Quiet Time
5-14-97
I wonder if you get lonely when you're by yourself
The only time I've seen you, you've been with someone else
Your smile is always pretty, and prominently displayed
But in your bed alone at night, does it ever fade?
Each mind is like a prison cell and no one can get in
The backward logic of it is that it's locked from within.
I wonder if just like me you stare upon the wall
Thinking thoughts you'll never care to share or to recall.
Who you are when you're alone no one can ever know
I only hope the truth is in the evidence you show.
Back to the Sky
5-15-97
Liquid white on a soft wash of blue
Swirling and racing, calling out
Come home.
We are all water where you belong,
We long for the dance and to reach you
Come home.
Clarity and pureness of sound and breath
Your mind to wash and soul to refresh
Come home.
End of a Chapter
5-17-97
Pressing mental fingers to grip what is past
my vision is truly completed, at last.
The frightening unknown has become fond memory,
strange new faces almost like a family.
Though tempted to glimpse through the curtain ajar
yet closes it quickly, so let me depart.
Making Memories
5-26-97
Built upon the stones of what is not, and what is now,
he struggles with a puzzle with no edges and somehow
it fits together perfectly before the pieces do;
How fitting that this world is but a circular venue.
Is tomorrow here? It is, and yesterday as well
but since he never knows but now, there is no way to tell.
The moment is so fleeting that it's gone before it's here
While past and future dance their dance, he merely sheds a tear.
Thoughts of a Retired Stalker
5-27-97
What a cute smile. I wonder who she is.
That's funny the way her hair does that.
Reminds me of my sister.
I wonder where she's going. Well, I'm not in a hurry.
Let's find out.
What a beautiful day. I always enjoy a good walk.
Looks like we're almost there.
The sun is smiling, with just enough breeze
To make you forget... the pain...
Speaking of which, I had better go home.
Too much trouble to cause without thinking, only feeling.
There are other smiles, and first
Mine needs to be one of them.
permanence
5-27-97
careful restoration, dauntless preservation
monumental nation, lasting for all time.
victim to erosion, nature's chaotic potion
failing all precaution, washed away with time.
Move Along
5-27-97
Tell me again your problem, it's "amnesia in reverse"?
You carry high-school pictures around in your purse.
The pages of your yearbook are worn from constant use.
You say the engine of your life is stuck in the caboose?
You still lament the break-up which occurred your freshman year
And attend every home game, having memorized each cheer.
The class ring is eternally adorning your left hand
While shopping in your varsity jacket makes you feel grand.
Every spring you cry because you've no date to the Prom.
You've got a major crush but you're the same age as his mom.
Your part-time job is boring, but at least you've got a car
And nowhere to drive it, for you never travel far.
Although it never quite seems real, your high school days are over.
The caboose can push but never pull, so be a forward-mover.
Kill My T.V.
6-7-97
Seductively, attractively, you pull my interest in.
One minute, productivity; the next, Dr. Quinn.
My diary and poetry lie silent on the shelf,
A happy souvenir of when I could think for myself.
Halfway down the pathway you created for my mind,
This message from our sponsors jolts me off of my behind.
Singing as I'm flinging the remote upon the floor,
I kick the T.V. off its stand and heave it out the door.
The sunshine beats upon my porch and melts your helpless head
As happily I call my friend to tell her that you're dead.
Creative
6-16-97
I can be remarkably creative...
when I'm in love,
infatuated,
in trouble,
insane.
It's all the same!
But I can't when...
uh, I don't know.
Diary, Page One
6-16-97
The trespasser upon this spot
shall wish he'd never had his lot
For he who reads the words within
shall ever perish for his sin.
Spirit of Flight
6-19-97
I want to write higher
to let soar the spirit of no-words
breathe the trees to life
capture the soul of birds
But
armed with net and sword
you also capture a soul
without word
O limitless bounds hold fast
to the ground my pen
and then
the breeze gently blowing
all-knowing, at last
breathes life to the sacrifice tree
Indeed the mightier, vanquished
yet flowing
a river of growing
and meaningless soul
but somehow made whole by spirit
and wordless
I fly.
Sundown Beauty
6-19-97
Sundown allows a wonderful show
and while every person admires it so
I rather ethereal beauty forgo
In favor of basking in Everyone's glow.
Regarding, regarded, with sparkling eyes.
Adoring, adored, with plentiful sighs.
Receiving, received, an infinite prize.
Reflecting, reflected, a spirit so wise.
Who risks the beauty of humans to know
At sundown enjoys a spectacular show.
O Purple Mountain Majesty
6-21-97
O purple mountain majesty,
I dream of thee today
Thy prominence, magnificence
maketh my soul to sway.
Such Sweet Sorrow
6-25-97
The moonlight shone down on your beaming face
that night of the first goodbye
The fresh night air filled my lungs
with vigor enough to sigh
You thoughtfully picked a purple lilac
to make separation sweet
You radiantly smiled and said,
"I will see you soon again."
The sun shines down on the wooden case
this day of the last goodbye
The fresh summer air fills my lungs
with vigor enough to cry
I sorrowfully picked a purple lilac
to make separation sweet
I remember your smile and whisper,
"May I seen you soon again."
And above all else, I've learned,
I shouldn't have taken you for granted.
The Box
6-25-97
Imagine, if you will, a box.
And this box is abundantly padded,
But it is dark, and cold,
And surrounded by people who are
Crying and in love simultaneously,
And needing answers to life's hardest questions.
They are mourning, but you do not know it
or do you?
Because you are in the box,
And you will remain there,
Not going to work,
Not raising your kids,
Not spending your time in any way that you choose
Because death is chosen for you.
The people will come and go as they choose
And will forget you in a while
And see the marker and wonder who you were
And how you lived
Because that is the important thing.
You have no choices after entering the box.
Your days of freedom are indeed numbered
So make your choices
And Live Now.
Dead Man Walking
6-25-97
As step by step I near my death,
The end of all I know,
I mourn myself and grieve, and yet
The time I cannot slow.
My day of death in history
Is marked and will not change,
So useless is my calendar
The date to rearrange.
As candlelight which is snuffed out
Before it turns to flame,
My life will soon have exited
The stage without a name.
Ph.D
6-29-97
Everyone's got one, it's all the rage
You're crazy if you don't,
You gotta gotta get the degree
You're crazy if you won't.
It will change you, make you complete
Get you what you want,
I know, we all know what you want,
Too much money to count.
Where are you going, listen to me!
Don't throw your life away!
Foolish, idealistic kid,
You'll regret it someday.
So Much You'll Never Know
7-11-97
God once said thou shalt not covet,
Easier said than done.
The law of the heart, I'm not above it,
Though your heart I won.
So many years, so much to say,
Such paths which a lonely way go
So much I've learned since that somber day,
So much you'll never know.
First Road-Trip
7-11-97
I look with virgin eyes out the passenger-side window
How in God's name can all creation move by so fast?
I've scarcely time to preceive a tree or flower
But it races away into the distance we've passed.
What are these monsters with people inside them?
Mouths on each side for human consumption!
Lord, have mercy, let me not be eaten alive
To spend eternity in the belly of these gluttons!
May the world slow down and this nightmare cease!
This is simply unnatural, please bring me some peace!
Rainy Day Rainbow
9-10-97
Though gray and rainy here below,
Yet I see a life rainbow.
The plants exude a luscious green;
Bright yellow daisies can be seen
With rows of roses, richly red,
A thriving purple riverbed.
While clear in miind, I clearly view
The sky above is still sky blue.
Above these clouds, their tops are white,
A warm reflection of sunlight.
Now I See
10-29-97
Naked, longing, radically pulled
Is this how they cry,
Hiding their faces,
but hoping to catch a glimpse
Even of the glory in your wake?
Nykerk Photo
11-2-97
Wixom, Connecticut, Saudi Arabia, Charlotte,
North Carolina, sunny California and six-
month dark Alaska, even in Holland, Michigan
They all look at the picture and recall
the time when flowers were taped to their
doors with duct tape and there were a
dozen colorful signs proclaiming their awesomeness.
Thirty-thousand hopefuls with bright eyes
have shaken the president's hand since the
day they all said goodbye, but on this day
the photographer is still standing on a wooden
ladder in the Civic Center saying "make a
nice smile." They do.
Limerick 1
12-21-97
I once met a man at the dives
Who had cheated on both of his wives.
The fellow just grinned
When I told he'd sinned;
He's an actor on Days of Our Lives.
If At First
12-28-97
I spread my arms running
and leap for the sky
my mom is out of band-aids
but still I try
Where We Are
12-29-97
I haven't been taking you seriously
I have my own answers are important
But you are still and wait
For me
I know that I do not know
You and I gave up on it
But you know you didn't
So do I
I have feelings of desire
And shadows of the past
Do you ever change
Me?
Paradox of Identity
12-30-97
People are not natrually like anything
but what people tell them to be
So I'm telling you now: Avoid the trap,
Don't be yourself!
Last update: December 11, 1998.
http://www.cs.utah.edu/~thelenm/personal/poetry/1997.html