THE INCREDIBLE ON-LINE STORY OF MY LIFE

Now featuring excerpts from my soon-to-be-released autobiography!

Lovingly dedicated to my family.


Chapter 1: The Past

I was born at an early age... My childhood memories consist of disproportionate amounts of dead bugs, olive-green bell-bottoms, and family vacations. I suffered most of my early years from a severe case of too-many-brothers syndrome. It is only recently, since they've grown up and moved away, that I've been able to really appreciate my brothers growing up and moving away.


Chapter 2: The Present

(This chapter is necessarily somewhat vague and nebulous since the infinitessimally small instant in time we refer to as the "present" stretches on indefinitely. . .and just when you think it is, you realize it isn't, and only was. . .)

Chapter 3: The Future

As for the future, graduation with a B.A. is not far distant (wow, am I old!). Then I'll head to graduate school for a PhD. I'll have to wait a few years after winning my Nobel prize to serve as President of the United States, since I have to be at least 35 to run. After my eight years as head of the nation, I'd like to spend some time in space, viewing the universe. Finally, I think I'll find cures for cancer and AIDS and eliminate war and poverty from the world.

I guess those are about all the plans I have for now, though I do see a small retirement cottage in the Caribbean in my future.



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Last modified: Jan. 23, 1998

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